Stuart Stone
Oct 24, 2013 8:46 AMBy my reckoning, this page has more messiah like characters (who have 'died' a civil death & been brought back to life) than the other story that the men in dresses get all hot n sweaty about...
Just off the top of my head & this is definitely not an exhaustive list...(not in any order chronologically OR of importance...why not rip off a winning formula from the kiddy fiddlers in Rome when it works so well?)
We have saint Fucks the Puppy (Saint Peter was stretching it too far) who renounced his name after 3 days in the wilderness...he was sacrificed for his sins & then came back to life as the 'Administrator'.
The multiple personality John/Jay/Bob fella who hopefully gets 'healed' or 'heeled' (play on words depending on perspective) or keeps falling out of the boat, only to have his alter ego(s) pull him back in...brings new meaning to the 'fishers of men' crap I was inflicted with in sunday school (what a weird concept...go to the state's baby sitting service 5 days a week & if you don't act brainwashed enough on Saturday, you get sent back for another dose of indoctrination n dogma on Sunday).
Then there's the faptastic buck-o-five man that is now off fighting crime (or just stirring up a hornet's nest) where no man has gone before...kind of like a hybrid Superman/Star Trek character.
And we now have the next messiah like character...The Master of Maxims, the Translator of Trusts, The Punisher of Public Policy Pedants & the Tormentor of Toronto....back after several days in the wilderness, where he created his own interpretation of an oversized doorstop that Saint Fucks the Puppy describes as a cure for insomnia...kinda like the Presbyterians (more conservative & literal in its approach, just suffers from an uninspiring brandname)
And finally, we have the creator...a mix of old testament Because I Fucking said so & as the creator I'm always right, but with a twist...this creator has a penchant for weed n hookers & a sexual appetite rivalling Mohammad's (not the prophet because that would be disrespecting someone's beliefs :P, I mean my local pizza boy Mohammad, humps anything that moves)...and this creator has an infrastructure filled with very capable people (Ceit the ghostbuster & Tara the Terminator of bad grammar & Dan the train conductor for the Douchewitz line) , so we can be very confident that this creator CAN & DOES get shit done.
Holy crap, if this group turned to the darkside & began random acts of indoctrination & brainwashing, the marketing potential would be awesome! ;-)
We have holidays (Kick a - insert public pirate group here- in the face day) as well as various saint cum bunny days...sacrifices of mothers, daughters, sisters etc...a truly interactive 'faith'...except none of it needs to be faith based because it is all verifiable in fact, within the page that is TTFL! :D
And the group is secret...creates a certain intrigue that everyone will want a piece of...a marketer's dream (just ask the Goths & satanists)
Now that I have removed my tongue from my cheek...Cheers & thanks to all...I greatly appreciate what it is you all/we all do here to learn, grow & in the future, assist the Admiral in realising his goals & purpose.
Welcome back Derek Moran
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Last Updated: Oct 24, 2013 8:46 AM
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